All I wanted to do was get some stuff to make breakfast this morning. Seems like a simple task right? Only I would end up having disaster after disaster occur.
First up, I decided to put pants on seeing as how it looks gloomy and cold this morning. I dug into a bag of clothes my aunt had given me since I knew there were exercise pants in there that I could throw on real quick. Not a big deal, right? I put them on and head out the door with the kids. In the car, I discovered this!
Yes folks, that's a huge tear in the pants that leads right up to my crotch! Too late to turn back to the house, I'm already in the parking lot! Well I guess it wasn't too late, but I own a gas guzzler now, so I wasn't going to turn back!With my thighs close as ever, I kept it pushing despite the fact that my 3yr old was now announcing to the world that he wanted to see my hole!
Next up on the list was my daughter's fall. Yes, my daughter fell right at the register! And do you think anyone stopped to ask if she was ok? Of course not despite the fact that she fell in front of the security guard and the cashier! Are they supposed to report those incidents? Seems like a great way to get sued. Anyway, as we leave the cashier just reminds us to drive safe. WHAT? That's all you can come up with after seeing my daughter take a backwards dive? It was like one of those slow falls where you try to wave your arms like a windmill to keep from falling. It was epic! Anyway, she survived. She might have a bruise on her hip, but she survived.
Last, but not least, the tyrant. Ah yes, the 3yr that can't help but to run and jump and race to be top dog. He, like normal, decided to race to the door. I don't know who he was racing. Perhaps he was trying to beat his best time. Well, he sped beyond our sight and all we heard were cries of pain and agony, for he too had fallen. As we approached our door, he was struggling to pick himself up off the ground, his face dangerously close to an elevated wooden panel.
Thank goodness we all survived, my oldest the only to make it through unscathed.
First up, I decided to put pants on seeing as how it looks gloomy and cold this morning. I dug into a bag of clothes my aunt had given me since I knew there were exercise pants in there that I could throw on real quick. Not a big deal, right? I put them on and head out the door with the kids. In the car, I discovered this!
Yes folks, that's a huge tear in the pants that leads right up to my crotch! Too late to turn back to the house, I'm already in the parking lot! Well I guess it wasn't too late, but I own a gas guzzler now, so I wasn't going to turn back!With my thighs close as ever, I kept it pushing despite the fact that my 3yr old was now announcing to the world that he wanted to see my hole!
Next up on the list was my daughter's fall. Yes, my daughter fell right at the register! And do you think anyone stopped to ask if she was ok? Of course not despite the fact that she fell in front of the security guard and the cashier! Are they supposed to report those incidents? Seems like a great way to get sued. Anyway, as we leave the cashier just reminds us to drive safe. WHAT? That's all you can come up with after seeing my daughter take a backwards dive? It was like one of those slow falls where you try to wave your arms like a windmill to keep from falling. It was epic! Anyway, she survived. She might have a bruise on her hip, but she survived.
Last, but not least, the tyrant. Ah yes, the 3yr that can't help but to run and jump and race to be top dog. He, like normal, decided to race to the door. I don't know who he was racing. Perhaps he was trying to beat his best time. Well, he sped beyond our sight and all we heard were cries of pain and agony, for he too had fallen. As we approached our door, he was struggling to pick himself up off the ground, his face dangerously close to an elevated wooden panel.
Thank goodness we all survived, my oldest the only to make it through unscathed.
Hilarious!! I'm glad you all survived too.
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