Sunday, May 23, 2010
TIFFANY
As I was washing my daughters hair she asked me, "Mom do you know Tiffany?" I thought she was talking about the jewelry company, so I said yes. She said, "No you don't." I said, "Okay, then who is Tiffany?" She replied, "Tiffany is a boy that dresses and talks like a girl!" Whoa! I had to inquire about this Tiffany person. She told me Tiffany is on some cartoon she watches on the cartoon network. I immediately said I don't think she should be watching this cartoon, assuming this was on the adult swim time slot for that channel, and she asked why. So I asked if that bothered her, seeing a boy dress and act like a girl. She said no. I asked if she thought that was normal. Again, she said no. I don't know if I really should ban her from seeing images like this, or if she is able to handle the reality that some boys like to assume more feminine roles and some girl are more masculine. After all, she sees it on the streets. I can't shield her from life. I can't shield her from other people and their lifestyles whether or not I like them. I personally do not have a problem with homosexuals and I hate prejudice that they face. I want my children to be educated about things that aren't "normal" and I want them to be courteous to everyone regardless of their sexual preference. Am I handling this correctly?
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I think you have to look at the maturity of your child. I have also had issues with some of the things my daughter has seen on tv. Some things I have outright objected to, and others I have made the decision to allow. If you feel she is mentally ready to handle and process those images, then YES you did the right thing.
ReplyDeleteall i would have said was hell to the no, don't watch that crap. Yes these images are in the streets, and i have no control over them, however, in my house, i can turn and change the channel. I got a lil boy, I dont want him seeing those images, becuase i have to explain it.. which i just calming say, that is a hot monkey mess.
ReplyDeleteTo think that there are cartoons like that on the cartoon network. Adult swim i can understand, even that, has shows that make me want to turn the channel.
I think you handled the situation right. you will just need to censor what the little ones watch. i miss tom and jerry and scooby doo..:)
(pt 2)
ReplyDelete....So when it comes to cartoons and tv, and even things outside...listen closely. When things that are unapprorpiate show themselves....you look at it as an opportunity to tell and teach ur kids the next life lesson. You dont sheild them from it at that point (not right there, but keep reading), when it shows itself, u IMMEDIATELY address it, and explain to them why its wrong, why its bad, why its harmful, and explain to them that these things are a part of this world, and they are present in this world. And explain how just because you WILL see other people behaving in these mannors on TV, and outside, dosnt mean YOU do it to. Because THEY will feel the consiquences, ALWAYS. There are ALWAYS consequences for bad/ dysfunctional behaviors, ALWAYS.
So you THEN inform them that, after this point, you will not take part in being around, or SEEING or WATCHING, these bad things. So you can no longer watch it on TV, you can no longer sit and watch other ppl do it outside, if you see them...leave the area, or divert ur attention elsewhere, and you can not be around it, if its around, leave the area, if its a friend, you will no longer have that friend (same if this friend was very bad and was into drugs, gangs, or doin anything else thats bad and is also a bad influence). This is ur job as the parent, to make these decisions, because the child isnt capable of making them, a child aint capable of makin ANY serious decisions, and they make them with considering consequences and possible outcomes. A child dont even know "consequences" exist, and cant even grasp the conceptm, even up into the late teen ages.
In conclusion, to just attempt to shield, them, when these things occur, address it, immediately. And explain to them why whatever it is, is wrong and harmful, and shameful, to themselves and their family, and explain to them some of the consequences to it (explain to the level of their maturity, u may need to leave SOME things out until they get a little older). This, gives them the information and instills in them, how they should look at it and feel about it, so then...you dont have to MAKE them, not engage in the behavior, not watch that TV show, now be around the environment, not be around the people, u dont have to MAKE them, becuase they now have all that information, they want to NOT DO IT, on their own. 1 of the secret tricks to parenting, some things, u cant just MAKE the child do somethin, u have to give them information, and make them WANT to do it (or not do it).
This issue here, you better get strong sweety, cuz this society we live in now, this right here and things like it (cuz this is how they are making it)..will happen more and more, so be strong and create a strong, VERY strong...moral foundation, for ur kids..so they dont fall prey, if you dont...they will.
-All commin from someone who is VERRRRY skilled and gifted in the mental health field, but also..just a regular guy (well, not that regular lol, but u get my point ;-) Good luck sweety
(Correction).....in conclusionsion, DONT attempt to sheild them......etc etc*
ReplyDeleteAlso, i also meant to add, if u happen to not have information on (whatever it is at the time), on why whatever it is, is wrong/ harmful..etc, then you go do research, and/or take the child to someone who DOES have the information. (VERY important, alot of parents FAIL in this area, resulting in kids developing in a VERY fucked up way, and end up with SO many problems later in life).
Anyway, i wish u luck :-)