I CAN'T MAKE THIS SHIT UP

I swear I can't make up some of the dumb things people do.  For example I was watching the news last night and some idiot thought it would be a good idea to disguise some cocaine as Easter eggs to bring across the border in a paper bag with a false bottom.  When he was stopped he claimed he was bringing his kids Easter eggs.  First off who the hell brings their kids Easter eggs for Christmas?  He should have been arrested on the spot just for getting his holidays messed up!  No one would believe that lie  NO ONE!  The paper bad with the false bottom was a pretty good idea but he's lucky it didn't fall apart.  Well I guess he isn't lucky anyway since he got caught.  He might have succeeded if he would have made candy canes instead.  


Next up on our fuckery menu is a lady who faked her own kidnapping.  Yeah you read it right she faked her own kidnapping!  She took pictures of herself bound and gagged!  Why would she do that you ask?  Because she wanted to know if her husband loved her enough to pay the ransom in the sum of 26k! REALLY?  Is this what we're resorting to?  Anyway she is in jail for that dumb shit.  I would like to know who took the pictures and helped her.  Can you imagine your home girl calling you up like hey can you do me a favor and tie me up and pretend like I'm missing to see if my husband really loves me?  UH NO!


This last one had to be due to drugs.  Some guy wakes up his dad and starts swinging a samurai sword at him! His dad is ok but this is what happens when you mix bakugan and drugs! Motherfuckers think they're super hero's and shit.  Oh if you don't know bakugan is a video game.  Let this be a lesson make your kids put down the video games and go outside!


Disclaimer: my comma button is broken thanks to my baby so forgive my grammar mistakes.